I don't know how long I have before it's my time to 'go'. Please read without judgment, I've had enough of that throughout my short life (52) Some names will be changed, the stories are true, I speak from my heart and soul. I don't mean to hurt anyone, I don't like hurting people. I need my story told.
Why do you still creep into my bed in the quiet hours of the night haunting my dreams. watching visions of you, a character in an epic play flowing through the long night. The sound of your voice ringing crystal clear in my ears, you're as real as though you were here. I watch without control just as life spun out of control, as the roles are played out. Sometimes you're sorry wanting to sooth the pain, others cold and hard not caring I'm watching with tears as you play your role.
As the play in the night starts fading away that old familiar feeling lets itself be known. Slowly, ever so slowly at first my heart starts to break over and over, my soul becomes lost again. With the remnants of promises that weren't kept, what was to be a beautiful happy life that turned to anger, fear and pain, my tears start to flow. I wake sobbing heartbroken all over again asking
"when will the pain in my heart ever stop, will the hole left in soul ever heal"