WHY DO I DO THIS

TO MYSELF ?

Last week I was told of two yard sales, one last weekend and the other this past weekend, I tried so hard to push this information to the depths of my mind. The fact I lose track of the days and time I nearly made it past the first yard sale….NEARLY…..

Last Saturday morning Pappy had taken Annie out while I fed the kittens, our 6:00 am daily ritual. This time Pappy and Annie seemed to be taking longer than normal, my first thought was Houdini had slipped her harness again, and so I did the worst thing I could’ve done at that moment….I looked out the front window, my heart sank….The yard sale !!! I can’t tell you how much I fought with myself, should I go or not. It was one of my bad days, breathing off, a lot of pain and falling asleep on my feet.

Knowing they had rented at some point in the past to some of the people that had broken into our house, when they moved out they left behind a lot of what they’d stolen. In past yard sales at this particular location I’d managed to buy back some of our belongings, I had to pass over buying something's back from my family because they had been ruined. Though at this time we can’t afford to spend money on unnecessary things I just had to go. I am desperately trying to find something a member of my family sent me, and something the seller had said a few times had me hopping it just maybe in this yard sale.

Sadly it wasn’t there, I did manage to buy back a couple of things, others I had to walk away from because I couldn’t afford them. I didn’t have the energy to dig through everything that was there and dragged myself back home, with the promise of going back with the dollar twenty-five cents I owed them. With a heavy heart and frustration I tried to lay down and rest but couldn’t, I learnt from past experience more was brought out to sell after I’d left. After a few torturous hours I shuffled back over with my money and a few extra cents…Just incase. Sure enough more had appeared, I couldn’t afford those but did find a nice jacket for 25cents. The daughter (whom I’ve watched grow up from afar) was very sweet and helped me out with a cord for my kindle fire HD.

I don’t hold it against these particular sellers for putting things left behind by renters up for sale, it’s good business sense. What does hurt is they knew some of those items belonged to me, it’s amazing how much people say with their body language. The first time I realized they had some of my belongings (years ago) I was stood on my front lawn talking to someone and watched as they emptied things out of their vehicle. That was also the first time they realized they had our belongings. I watched as the husband placed something's out for trash, his wife took a handbag into the house, she suddenly runs out pulls her husband to one side, showed him something while glancing over my way. It just so happens it was our trash day, theirs is the day after, and the trash truck was making it’s way down the road. The couple suddenly picks things up from their trash pile, ran it across the road to a neighbors and dropped in the trash just in time for the trash men to pick it up.

I honestly stood there watching in shock not knowing what to do, I knew they are not the type to break into peoples homes, but how did they have our belongings. I knew they had businesses but at that time didn’t know they had rental properties. The first yard sale of theirs I went to I was shocked how much of our belongings they had, the problem was there was nothing with our name on or that I had photos of (which is what the police wanted) There was the case of singles (remember those ?) that my younger sister had sent me from England, sorry Di, the case  of LP’s Mommy had sent me with my Elvis collection plus some of mommies LP’s, sorry Mommy. The Beatrix Potter book and mug my niece and nephew had sent when they were little and things my older sister sent me, sorry kids, sorry Andie. All ruined.

I could go on with a list of things but what's the point, I tried to let them know these were our belongings, I was so upset I didn’t know what to say. I did mention that our house keeps getting broken into and noticed how uncomfortable they became. In their second yard sale they’d put out some of my jewelry,(which had been stolen not long before the yard sale) it was interesting how she suddenly starts loudly proclaiming 'This piece was from such and such’ and ‘oh I remember when I wore’ It was so obvious how nervous she was. This was the same reaction with a Tupperware shoe box that had a nativity set I’d made for a customer to go with a ceramic tree I’d repaired. Not only was it still in the same box, it was still packed in the same way. I grabbed a handful of the jewelry and a few others things walked home in tears.

As I was going through the jewelry I found a couple of pieces I’d made myself and a necklace I’d bought in a boutique in Philly. Sadly again I missed my chance with the police, because no one else had seen them at the yard sale it would be my word against theirs. I had a lot of respect for this couple, he reminded me of my dad in his later years. The sad thing is, what are they teaching their daughter about honesty and integrity by blatantly lie like this right in front of the child. If I’d found myself in possession of someone's belongings I would return them. The thing is they know the people who stole them, grew up with some of them BUT they also knew our house was constantly being broken into. 

Second yard sale.

Again I found myself struggling over whether or not to go to this yard sale, they had so much out and I felt worse than last week. Yes I finally dragged myself over and I could feel the ‘oh hell she’s here’. This is one has very close connections with the break in’s, again there are things I’m not going into, they can be found   on this page which is a work in progress so visit it often for updates. This time I really had very little energy to dig through the piles of stuff they had, at a glance I didn’t see too much of ours. I did manage to buy back some jewelry and amazingly a skirt to a top I’ve been hanging onto in the hopes it would show up at a yard sale for years. I hung onto it because again I’d bought it from a boutique in Philly and it was expensive. I did quietly talk to the seller about the skirt saying I had the top in my closet and the skirt had gone missing. I don’t know why she feigned surprise, she knew how it got there plus knows I know. She let me have the skirt and made a comment to someone as I walked away ‘Now she’s going to say’ I didn’t hear the rest but could easily fill it in.

As I was shuffling around with my walker and oxygen I heard a couple of guys talking. It had the feeling of being a staged conversation, they were talking loud enough for everyone in the yard to hear. The conversation was about someone they knew who’d been in hospital, ‘he was walking so slow you could tell he wasn't faking it’ one guy says. Then they went onto to how he wasn’t liked because he’d said something about someone. Not liking the vibration coming from them I shuffled off in another direction. Suddenly one of the men jumped in front of me and said ‘You look like you have some issue going on, is it your lungs ? you’re the one that lives across the street, what's your name’s Jean’ Telling him my correct name and my lung problem, I got the feeling I was being mocked, It’s not the first time she’s done this to me.

Again this is someone I had a lot of respect for and admired how she kept herself together through certain problems when we first moved here. I dragged myself back, feeling as low as the gutter and curled up in a ball for a while. I wish we could afford to sell this house at a loss, have a moving company pack  and move us out of this state.

guess I’m faking it huh!!