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Thursday, July 25, 2013

REMOVED


DISQUS

Some of you may notice I removed Disqus from my blog today. Try as I might I couldn't get it to load nor work correctly with blogger. I even tried looking for the HTML code that I was supposed to be able to manually change. I spent hours reading and reading and reading and rereading every line of code, NOTHING looked like the code Disqus said to look for, so I couldn't even manually load it to blogger.

Hopefully things will run smoothly and at some point I'll find away for peoples tweets or facebook comments about my posts to show up on my blog. If anyone has a problem with posting a comment or viewing my blog PLEASE LET ME KNOW.

THANK YOU

Tuesday, July 16, 2013

WHY DO I DO THIS


TO MYSELF ?
DSCF0117

Last week I was told of two yard sales, one last weekend and the other this past weekend, I tried so hard to push this information to the depths of my mind. The fact I lose track of the days and time I nearly made it past the first yard sale….NEARLY…..

Tuesday, June 25, 2013

I CAN’T STOP THE…

THE ANGER

RISING

They say, dream it, envision it, believe in it, work for it and it will come to be.
I did all that and now….. 

Me (on oxygen) in my ceramics studio 3 weeks after my first hospital stay with respitory distress in 2004
IN MY STUDIO
I've finally (kind of) come to accept I can no longer cling to the hope that one day I'll be able to have a ceramics studio again. There are several reasons for this:

Thursday, June 20, 2013

IT'S JUST......


ONE OF THOSE DAYS 

AGAIN

 
THE COMFORT OF ANNIE


It's another one of those days my mind dizzy with the "what if's, how did I get here, what did I  do that was so wrong, why can't I have just a small part of the life I dreamed of, am I so unlovable, why do I feel so alone, why can't I do something right"


Friday, May 31, 2013

Welcome | MikePeralta.com

Welcome | MikePeralta.com




I met this guy some time past on twitter  very late one night, he was feeling nostalgic and was self critical, as for me it was just another bad night. We got to chatting in direct message (don't bother asking I won't tell you) as the night wore, subjects changed our quirky sense of humour emerged. By the end of the night our moods turned around and I was giggling, we went over cover pictures for an album Fosner he was working. Warning him not to give everything away and offering to help anyway I could we finally said goodnight.

For a short while I was able to promote on   and facebook,
 as an idea for a fan page started forming in my mind I became ill, I am happy to say someone has done a fan page  . I am now back trying to do what I can before it's time to 'go', everyone deserves a chance and Mike certainly does. Visit him, chat with him, follow him and buy his downloads....they're not expensive.

HERE ARE SOME OF 
FAVS. 


Mike Peralta: Will I Be Okay

This calls to all of us at some point in time, it reaches deep inside us and you can feel it comes from Mikes heart and soul. We've all managed to pull ourselves up but, at times have a need to visit that place again....This will take you there.

Thursday, May 30, 2013

OH DEAR

Not Feeling Well

Again...

ANNIE CHECKING MY BREATHING BY
SMELLING MY NOSE.
 

I suddenly realized it's been sometime since I've been in touch, I started to work on a post about my lungs on 5/20/2013 I am afraid I haven't got very far with it yet (I keep falling asleep). I do think about you all, even those of you I don't Know all that well, anyone who's been in touch with me has touched my heart (it's who I am). It will be the same for those who come into my life, even if it's for a very short time.


Monday, May 20, 2013

SUCKING AIR


JUST A BREATH 

OF AIR

PLEASE


I never in my life thought I'd end up like this

I think it's safe to say that breathing and our lungs are the biggest things we take for granted, even with something that seems as simple as a cold much thought (beyond complaining) isn't given to them.  It's hard for people to understand what an attack (or event) is like, unless they've had one or witnessed one. So I decided to post these mild event's I had a few hours apart a few weeks past. They have separate posting dates on youtube because I edited the second one, took me awhile to figure out how to do it.

Thursday, May 16, 2013

I AM NOT STUPID

I'm not stupid

an idiot nor a fool

THANK YOU YOLANDA FOSTER FOR GIVING ME
THE WORDS AND COURAGE TO WRITE THIS

I'M NOT STUPID, I'M NOT STUPID.... I find myself saying these words more often these days, tears flowing down my cheeks and frustration. It's a frustration like I've never felt before, a cup of tea

Sunday, May 12, 2013

AS I SLEEP

HAUNTING MY DREAMS


Why do you still creep into my bed in the quiet hours of the night haunting my dreams. watching visions of you, a character in an epic play flowing through the long night. The sound of your voice ringing crystal clear in my ears, you're as real as though you were here. I watch without control just as life spun out of control, as the roles are played out. Sometimes you're sorry wanting to sooth the pain, others cold and hard not caring I'm watching with tears as you play your role.

As the play in the night starts fading away that old familiar feeling lets itself be known. Slowly, ever so slowly at first my heart starts to break over and over, my soul becomes lost again. With the remnants of promises that weren't kept, what was to be a beautiful happy life that turned to anger, fear and pain, my tears start to flow. I wake sobbing heartbroken all over again asking 
"when will the pain in my heart ever stop, will the hole left in soul ever heal"     

Sunday, April 28, 2013

HEART BREAKING

PERSONAL CHOICE

 
MY DEAR OLD SWEET
MrT

"Births, Weddings and Deaths bring the best or the worst out in people "

Boy is that saying true, it's one saying out of the thousands out there that I actually agree with, though I would also add Holidays to that (any religious holidays regardless of religious persuasion). Plus what I've come to call Hallmark days, ya know those days the card companies keep making up. I have seen another side of folks around these times I didn't know they were capable of, talk about doing a double take to make sure I was talking the  right person.

Friday, April 26, 2013

MY DEAR SISTERS


 HOW TIME HAS FLOWN

My tiny sister Di in the middle
My niece Amy with my sister Andie

It has been 30yrs or more since I was in your company, with me moving to America. I remember when I first saw these few photos, I kept looking and looking, thinking "Who is this, they look familiar" It took me awhile to realize they are older versions of the young faces stored in my memory. Sadly my photo albums were stolen along with the yearly updates Andie and Mommy used to send (even in those you looked the same). I was shocked how much time had gone by.

WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY MOMMY.

DAVID.....

TRUE  GENTLEMAN

I don't remember ever seeing mommy so happy, nor seeing her laugh so much. It's the type of laugh that rises from deep within, exploding into a contagious, belly shaking tears rolling down the cheeks event. I just wish I knew how to record our skype sessions, the two of you sitting on mommies sofa cutting up on each other, giggling like a pair of kids caught with your hands in the honey pot. I can't put into words how much it's eased my mind knowing you're in her life.


Sunday, April 21, 2013

MOMMY

MOMMY AND DAVID

THANK YOU MOMMY, FIRSTLY for being my mommy, making sure I always had on a clean nappy (diaper). Goodness knows how many of those you swished in the toilet as you pulled the chain, nor how many soaking buckets you emptied each wash cycle (nappies were cloth and toilets had pull chains back then). For making sure I  was fed, my goodness all those bottles you must have washed, sterilized, rinsed then filled over and over again. Mothers today have no idea how easy this part has become, though more expensive and less earth friendly. For doing all that encompassed being a Mommy....
My Mommy


Sunday, April 14, 2013

SOME KNOW YOU AS 'W'

I need to say THANK YOU to Pappy. Boy have we had our laughs, I can't help but smile when I think of the time we set out to go fishing in old Bessy with your second son.  The weather was perfect, the cooler packed with goodies, old and new fishing tackle, chairs to sit on. Excited for a fun day we piled into  old Bessy  and off we went. We hadn't got far before you ask #2 son for the map, to which he replied "what map?" It was obvious by the look on your face you knew where it was, on the table at home. We'd been pouring over it carefully picking out which lake to spend the day at. Against #2 son suggestion you decided WE didn't need it. I don't remember how many times we went past the same tower,you KNEW the way. Each time we'd go past the tower you'd drive a bit further, take more turns. The look on your face was a picture when you turned the corner and there was the tower, you silently muttered  to yourself  "oh dear"  I couldn't stop myself and burst out laughing when #2 son suggested 
 "It would help if you didn't keep turning right"

PAPPY WITH ANNIE


We did eventually make it to the lake and had a wonderful time,we didn't catch much that day but that didn't matter, we had fun. As the sun we getting low in the sky we packed up, made our way to the outside toilets. Being the gentleman you let me go first I tried to warn you about the mosquitoes as you desperately rushed in, but my words went unheard. I was trying to shout over the top of the wall you came bursting out with the biggest cloud of mosquitoes chasing you, pulling up your zipper shouting
 "OOH MY PECKER"